bright eyes + blue eyes

visitng my brother

When: Last week

Who: Abbie, Pumpkin, and Manzo

What: Visited my brother Joe at his home away from home (college)

Duration: We were there for a little less than 24 hours (1 night)

Summary: We had a wonderful time! Loved every minute. We stayed in a really cozy bed & breakfast close to campus. My mom is the queen of finding cool places to stay. We were in a little "guest house" behind the main house. Right when you walk in the door, you see a big, framed print of a tiger. Manzo spent lots of time pointing to the tiger (with excitement) and growling. He loved that tiger.

cute little turkey

The mothers-day-out teachers sent Manzo home with another photo today.

Cute little toothy grin!

my girl

A few weeks ago, we got an email from one of the administrators of our school, asking if Pumpkin would be willing to speak at the upcoming Open House.

Our school has an Open House twice each school-year for prospective families.

Pumpkin was absolutely delighted to be asked.

Within minutes, she had a pencil and paper in hand....she was ready to begin jotting down ideas for her speech.

She adores her school, so it was really easy for her to come up with lots of specific details.

* * * * *

Tonight was the Open House!

She did a fantastic job.

I love this sweet girl so much.

What a joy it has been to watch her bloom and grow.

(sidenote: For me, the phrase 'bloom and grow' immediately brings to mind Christopher Plummer singing Edelweiss...)

Grandparents: she would love to say her little speech for you when we see you at Thanksgiving!

One of the many things I've always loved about Pumpkin: she cracks me up when I ask if I can take a few pictures of her.

She will give me a few normal shots....

...and then suddenly we are ushered into the world of high drama.

She starts striking all kinds of hilarious poses.

She started doing this when she was LITTLE and has done it ever since.

Isn't it so amazing how you can see a little personality emerging even at such a young age.

I have pictures of her silly poses from ages 2, 3, 4....all the way up.

I've never really commented much about this cute little quirk directly to her.

I don't want her to get self-consicous and turn off the drama.

I know that day will be here before I know it.

I'll enjoy every one of these sweet little girl poses while I can.

 

 

Consuming Kids, by Susan Linn

Day 1: Read-Aloud Handbook, J. Trelease

Day 2: Your Money or Your Life, J. Dominguez & V. Robin

Day 3: Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Defecit Disorder, R. Louv

Day 4: Parenting with Love & Logic, F. Cline & J. Fay

Day 5: This Is Your Brain on Music, by D. Levitin

Day 6: Consuming Kids, by S. Linn

I'm okay with the fact that marketers craft messages targeted at adults.

Marketing and advertising is part of the world we live in.

However, we need to keep in mind that adults (for the most part) have maturity and discernment which allow them to filter and analyze the marketing messages they receive.

Children don't have that type of discernment yet---it will come later.

For that reason, I personally believe that children shouldn't be specifically targeted with marketing messages.

This book, Consuming  Kids, provided a lot more for me to think about when it comes to raising children in a very advertising-saturated culture. If you happen to get your hands on this book, be sure to read Chapter 1, in which the author describes her undercover experience at a "Advertising and Promoting to Kids" conference along with leaders in the industry.

If this book resonates with you, be sure to check out the non-profit organization Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood (CCFC). Susan Linn, the author of Consuming Kids, is the director of this organization. Several years ago I signed up to receive the email newsletters of CCFC, and I've really enjoyed staying informed by reading what CCFC is up to.

This Is Your Brain on Music, by Daniel J. Levitin

Day 1: Read-Aloud Handbook, J. Trelease

Day 2: Your Money or Your Life, J. Dominguez & V. Robin

Day 3: Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Defecit Disorder, R. Louv

Day 4: Parenting with Love & Logic, F. Cline & J. Fay

Day 5: This Is Your Brain on Music, by D. Levitin

I believe music is an amazing gift.

If you travel the globe, you'll find lots of different customs and cultures.

You'll find lots of differences when you compare cultures---but you'll always find music.

You'll also find music all throughout the timeline of humanity.

If I were an anthropologist, I'd like to investigate this question: is there a people group or culture in existence today in which music does NOT play a role?

There's just something about the way our brains were wired. Music is woven into the fabric of who we are as humans.

For some of us, music is a powerful (yet invisible) key that unlocks a heavy door and grants entry to the world of our emotions.(  <---I have one specific person in mind here, but it applies in a more general sense to lots of us!)

I wrote another post which touches on how much I love the gift of music:

Love. Think. Speak.

This Is Your Brain on Music is a fascinating look at how our brains process music. It's a very interesting book. I enjoyed it!

Parenting with Love and Logic, by Foster Cline & Jim Fay

Day 1: Read-Aloud Handbook, J. Trelease

Day 2: Your Money or Your Life, J. Dominguez & V. Robin

Day 3: Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Defecit Disorder, R. Louv

Day 4: Parenting with Love & Logic, F. Cline & J. Fay

When my oldest kids were in the 1yr - 3yr range, I started to have some major questions about how to establish boundaries. I also had questions about how/when to give consequences when my sweet little bambinos stepped over said boundaries.

Frankly, that entire process was harder than I thought it was going to be.

(reminds me of that phrase I've heard people say: "I was a much better mom before I had kids.")

I was trying so hard to be consistent. However, I wondered if I was doing something wrong--because I seemed to be reinforcing the same exact lessons over and over.

I began to pray for wisdom. Also, I began to ask around and look for books to give me some additional insight.

I found it really helpful to talk to moms who were a few years ahead of me. I really appreciated their wisdom & their words of encouragement.

In terms of books, I kept finding lots of "theory books." For example, Shepherding a Child's Heart: the idea of this book is that we are not designing a system of behavior modification so that our kids can have precisely the kind of external behavior that we want them to have. Rather, we should try to go to the root of issues that come up with our kids. We should always remember that we are gently and lovingly shepherding their little hearts. We want respect and love to come from their heart and radiate outwards.

While I agreed wholeheartedly with all the theory books out there, I got to the point where I just needed to read a book with some very practical ideas. I needed to have suggestions. "....Try this! And if that doesn't work, try this!"

Parenting with Love & Logic has lots of practical ideas. I don't agree with every piece of advice in the book, but a lot of what the authors recommend is right up my alley. I love how they advocate logical consequences. I love how they give practical tips to the parent about staying calm and consistent.

They use an example of a referee who blows his whistle to say that the player is out of bounds. Does the referee get frustrated and scream at the player, "why did you step out of bounds?!?!?" No. The referee consistently points out the already-agreed-upon boundary and gives the already-agreed-upon consequence.

The boundaries/consequences is the "logic" part of their system.

The other part is pretty self-explanatory--"love" from the parent to the child. They emphasize that parental love should not feel conditional whatsoever. They give some good practical tips about how to show love to your child. They want you to steer away from empty flattery and go towards real relationship connection with your child.

I have failed a lot as a mom, and I have certainly been an exasperated/frustrated/yelling referee many times. (Come to think of it, I really should re-read these books and be encouraged all over again by their advice.) However, despite my failures, I know that God is at work in my heart and in the hearts of my children. It's been helpful to remember suggestions from this book. The authors' advice has been really beneficial to me in my journey as a mom.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Last Child in the Woods : Saving Our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder, by Richard Louv

Day 1: Read-Aloud Handbook, J. Trelease

Day 2: Your Money or Your Life, J. Dominguez & V. Robin

Day 3: Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Defecit Disorder, R. Louv

When I get to spend time hiking or at the lake, I feel re-calibrated on the inside.

I love that feeling.

I think lots of other people feel the same way about peaceful time spent outside.

The way I look at it, children come in to this world with an incredible curiosity about God's creation.

Have you ever taken a walk with a 2 year old? 3 year old? Such fascination with all that God has made.

Personally, I think that curiosity is hard-wired into our existence.

Children love to explore the great outdoors. Child development experts tell us how much children learn about how the world works by having millions of little outdoor experiences, such as throwing pebbles in a creek.....exploring the design of veins on a fall leaf....marveling at the stars on a clear summer night.

I feel strongly about wanting my kids to have rich experiences outside.

Also, I think our time together outside is really amazing and tends to strengthen our relationships as parent/child, brother/sister, husband/wife.

I love it when Hunter tells me about all the time he and his dad spent together in the deer woods throughout Hunter's childhood. When Hunter closes his eyes and contemplates his relationship with his dad as a kid, he automatically thinks "deer woods."

Is that because of the deer?

No.

It's because they had quiet time together. They were away from the hustle and bustle. Hunter's dad taught him lots of things during those hunting trips, such as how to step gingerly through the woods without making a sound. Besides practical hunting tips like that, they had great conversations about life in general. All those little experiences together were strengthening and deepening their bonds as father and son.

This book, Last Child in the Woods, was really fun to read because it explored the topic of children in the great outdoors. I enjoyed it!

 

 

 

Your Money or Your Life, by Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin

Day 1: The Read-Aloud Handbook, by J. Trelease

Day 2: Your Money or Your Life, by J. Dominguez and V. Robin

I read this book back in 2002. I know exactly when I read it because I remember that I brought it along on a trip we took with some friends over spring break 2002. Hunter was about to graduate from seminary. Our little group of friends was about to be broken up (at least geographically.) We took a trip to Sea Island, GA.

I need to flip back through this book to re-acquaint myself. I remember really liking it. I remember that some of the key themes of the book really resonated with me. One major theme is that money does not buy happiness. Working at a job you don't enjoy--simply to get a paycheck--is not a satisfying way to spend four or five decades. Find something you love to do, and adjust your lifestyle accordingly. You'll be much happier over the years if you enjoy your day-to-day calling/vocation.

From what I remember, this book isn't written from a Christian perspective. However, the message of stepping away from the consumerist frenzy is something that lines up really well with my faith.

Now that I've written a few sentences about my memories of this book, I've intrigued myself and I want to re-read it.

* * * * *

And while I'm at it, here are two random snapshots from the spring break '02 trip that I mentioned. We had so much FUN that week.

sidenote: I was 6months pregnant with my first child at the time.

another sidenote: I'm wearing an Auburn Red Cross Blood Drive t-shirt in the bottom picture. That really cracks me up because I still have that shirt and it is absoutely the softest, most wonderful old cotton t-shirt I own. I love it so much. It has holes in a couple of different places, but I still wear it as a nightshirt sometimes. Hunter was just teasing me the other day about how it's time to say good-bye to the Blood Drive t-shirt. I'll have to show him this picture to remind him that 10 years ago this shirt actually looked good enough to wear in public.

The Read-Aloud Handbook, by Jim Trelease

This week my posts will be short & sweet. Each day I'm going to share the title of one of my favorite non-fiction books.

Here's today's book:

The Read-Aloud Handbook, by Jim Trelease

I first read this book in college, as required reading for one of my courses. (I was an elementary ed major.)

It had a big impact on me and helped shape my perspective on sharing books with my children.

I can't begin to tell you how much I've enjoyed reading aloud with my kids. I cannot WAIT to experience some of the same titles again with Manzo when he gets to the right age.

On a related note, some of my fondest childhood memories are times when my mom and dad read good books to me & my siblings. I'm so thankful for all those many hours of sharing good books. Such a gift! Reminds me of this poem.

 

 

in which I derive a puzzling amount of fulfillment from a wooden stacking toy

We all have our little quirks.

I'll share one of mine with you.

To all the moms out there: if you're like me, your house is never completely clean all at the same time.

(If, on the other hand, you are able to achieve that domestic nirvana, my hat's off to you!)

Over the years, I've found myself coming up with little benchmarks---if those particular things are completed, then I'm at least somewhat satisfied.

For example---the beds.

When the beds are made, that's sort of my first benchmark.

If all the beds in my house are made, I feel pretty good.

If all the beds in my house are made, and all the laundry is done, I'm feeling even better.

If all the beds in my house are made, all the laundry is done, and all the laundry is put away, I'm feeling really awesome.

If all the beds in my house are made, the laundry is done, the laundry is put away, the kitchen is cleaned up (with the happy hum of the dishwasher in the background), I am ECSTATIC.

* * * * *

I've recently realized I have a new benchmark.

There's a little wooden stacking toy that lives in our family room.

It was a gift from me & Hunter to Manzo on his 1st b-day.

I really love it. (More importantly, he loves it.)

I love the bright colors, I love the weight of the smooth wooden rings in my hands, and I love how neat and tidy it looks when the rings are stacked in order.

Well, I've noticed a trend over the last few weeks....

My house can be driving me crazy, and the first thing I'm inclined to do (at least here in the family room), is get these nice wooden rings back in order.

It's the first step in getting my ducks back in a row.

Such a quick and tangible way to bring a little piece of disorder back into order.

Now you all know just how much of an oddball I really am. Ha!

Do you have little quirky things like that?

What do you find yourself doing first when cleaning up your house?

Anything that gives you a little boost of satisfaction and makes it easier for you to tackle the other 1,001 things that need to be done?